Mic Functions Properly

It has just been revealed that a mic that BO carries around in his pocket has been “open” for the last several weeks. Here’s just a few conversations overheard by his media  (thankfully for him) friends which of course would not have been revealed if we had not obtained these transcripts, purely by accident:

To the Gay community: “Give me a little space here. After the election, you’ll see what I’ll be able to do for you. Right now, you are only going to stir up your folks when you know I can’t afford to backtrack on my comments about opposing gay marriage that helped me in the last election. Trust me. You’ll like what I do next year.”

To the Sierra Club: “c’mon guys. I need some breathing room here for the next few months. You know we almost had a big problem with Solyndra. After the election, nobody’s gonna stop my “green movement”. Also, I can use a few more bucks from your guys for this campaign. Remember, elections don’t come cheap.”

To MSNBC: “Keep up the good work, guys. As soon as I’m reelected you’re gonna see the last of those a–holes at Fox. In the meantime, though, I’m gonna need some cover on the Israel thing.”

To Jeffrey Immelt: “Jeff, I appreciate what you’re trying to do. It buys me a little space if everybody thinks you’ve split with me but go a little easy “confiding” to your pals that you’ve “left the Obama camp entirely”. It could be misread by some of the business guys that you really don’t believe in us. Anyway, thanks for your help. It’ll be worthwhile for you.”

To leaders of the “Catholic Left”: “I need you to get me some breathing room with these Bishops and Cardinals until after I’m reelected. They haven’t hurt us yet but, you guys have got to convince them that I’ll make some more “adjustments” in my second term but they should keep in mind how much we’re on the same side of social justice and redistribution and in bringing down greedy corporations.

To George Soros: “George, please, you know I can’t declare martial law and suspend the elections now. There’s still a good chance I can win. And we still got the ‘Occupy’ guys if we need to create  conditions for me to declare a national emergency. Please, give me a few more weeks…the Republicans aren’t gonna get their act together and that doofus Boehner will give us a lot of opportunities”.

To Lisa Jackson (EPA): “I think it looks pretty good, Lisa. After the election, we’ll shut down the whole damn coal industry and the oil guys’ll be happy to pay us big time. But, you gotta cut me some slack with the regs. Even Romney could cause us a problem if we go too far before November”.”  Jackson: “OK, if you think it’s  all right with George (Soros?).”

To Michelle O.: “Why do you have to take two weeks on the Riviera just a month before the election? You know Fox and Limbaugh will go nuts with it…they’ll kill us on their shows!”.   Michelle: “I don’t give a s–t, Barack . What if you don’t get re-elected? You think I want to miss out on the goodies this f—–g gig is all about?”

Thanks to DLH and his sources in the MSM

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